This book did shed a lot of light on the subject. She will see a man who is quite likely to be very intelligent and hold down a very responsible job; announce that he really does not understand why she is never happy. If one of the partners is affected by Asperger syndrome and therefore unable to give or even understand the need for these basic ingredients, then the relationship is almost certainly going to run into problems. Aston's work I first decided to read by English couples counselor when it was recommended in perhaps the seminal clinical work on Asperger's Syndrome, 's. I am not in an Aspergers couple, but picked out this book as there are people in my wider family circle who - almost certainly - have Aspergers. I also feel like the number of persons interviewed were very minimal to actually write a book. This could result in an individual who may have high academic achievements, a responsible and skilled profession or field of employment and yet be quite unskilled in social interaction and communication.
The look was not reciprocated. He will focus all his attention on her and make her feel very special indeed. It could be said that Asperger syndrome is predominantly a relationship disorder and, as relationship problems are one of the main reasons many couples seek counselling, it is very likely that a counsellor will at some time encounter it. I also felt that the bullet point summaries at the ends of the chapters weren't terribly helpful. They cannot fulfil their partners' emotional needs or meet the demands that are made in the average couple relationship.
Her survey group is somewhat small--which is understandable given the time period in which it was written. Perhaps it is unsurprising that they are likely to feel either angry or depressed if those round them express frustration. At the same time there is a wealth of practical information about how couples can address and overcome problems. She states many times that those with Asperger's do not have empathy. I understand that this point is a controversial one.
The counsellor felt uneasy because it felt as though he was not paying any attention to what she was saying. Before the counsellor could finish her invitation to the couple to discuss their reason for being there Carol disclosed why they had come. Akademische Arbeit aus dem Jahr 2004 im Fachbereich Psychologie - Beratung, Therapie, notice: intestine, , Sprache: Deutsch, summary: Im heutigen Alltag sind wir rigidity in allen Lebensbereichen ausgesetzt, so tritt er bspw. Ultimately, volumes like Aspergers in Love function primarily as self-help books of one sort or another, and Aspergers in Love is, well, no different. With all findings illustrated with case examples taken from interviews conducted with couples, the author tackles issues such as attraction, trust, communication, sex and intimacy, and parenting. Beginning or the end The scenario above, although fictional, is very typical.
The rates of verbal and physical abuse in her studies are nothing short of alarming. I just know he's got Asperger's. If not, it would be advisable to refer the couple to someone who is trained in this area. Numerous relationship issues examined by Aston and those who were interviewed, including the many difficulties which both partners may face. It has also shown that the majority of these were dissatisfied with the counselling they received and the consequences of this counselling on their relationship. The couple sat in front of the counsellor. She will be saying things like 'He can't talk about his feelings.
It was also useful to be reminded of Aspies' real need for relationships. . She is a regular speaker at both National and International conferences. The counsellor will need to assess what is caused by Asperger's and what is due to the individual's basic personality traits. How would you know if one partner of a couple sitting in front of you suffered from Asperger syndrome? However given that I have felt years feeling angry, outraged and upset at never getting empathic responses, the idea that empathy simply never was an option does simplify matters. Working as a counsellor and specialising in individuals, couples and families affected by Asperger syndrome. Aspergers in Love gave me the confidence that I can have a long-lasting, successful, fun relationship with the right woman—and what better praise can I offer Aston and her book than that? Maxine delivers workshops for counsellors and professionals in an effort to raise awareness of Asperger syndrome.
As he is unable to work out what she is thinking or empathise with her emotional state. The written word does not require the same form of thought processing as verbal communication and it can work far more successfully with individuals with Asperger. He may be focused on their academic achievement rather than their personal growth. Many professionals still do not have an accurate understanding of what Asperger syndrome is. John did not look at the counsellor or his wife during this time; he did though glance around the room, spending a few seconds inspecting each chosen object until his gaze returned to the table. Author of '' published by the National Autistic Society 2001 and ': Couple relationships and family affairs' Jessica Kingsley publishers. It is possible that she will have taken all the responsibility for the running of the home, the finances and any social arrangements.
Asperger syndrome is a very complex and often misunderstood disorder. In some cases this may partly depend on the awareness, understanding and response given by the counsellor. As there is an increasing number of people with Asperger, and as more and more reach adulthood and seek relationships and have children, this is becoming an important topic. It isn't unreasonable to assume that one must first understand and be able to identify a problem before one can begin to address it. These assumptions are likely to have been wrong and it is possible he will have developed a fear of not getting it right.
The research and anecdotes on women with Asperger Syndrome also feels a bit light - that only a few participants became the generalization. I found it a bit speculative in many cases, where the author made some broad generalizations that I don't feel were appropriate or accurate. Research by Aston 2003 3 has shown that 75 per cent of couples affected by Asperger syndrome attended couple counselling. Numerous relationship issues examined by Aston and those who were interviewed, including the many difficulties which both partners may face. Maxine Aston is a controversial figure in the Aspie community. New methods and strategies will need to be learned and put into practice.
It was also useful to be reminded of how hard people with this syndrome may struggle with communication. You are the first person I've told. Aspergers was the first diagnosis that made any sense, in his case. Foreword, Gisela and Chris Slater-Walker. This book, given that background information, is surprisingly even-handed.